Boston Strong

I have to admit that I did not know that yesterday was the Boston Marathon.  I know, right?  How could I have forgotten?  When I saw the first post on facebook about the explosion, I just couldn’t believe it.  It was incomprehensible.  I sat staring at my monitor for a minute before it sunk in.  I vaguely remember saying to my grandmother, who was in the living room with me, that there was an explosion at the Boston Marathon and that I was going to put on CNN–for some reason I didn’t think that it would be on the regular channels.  The moment I put on the news was when it hit me.  Staring at the television, I realized that I knew the exact spot where the bombs went off–it was Copley Square.  I could see the main branch of the Boston Public Library, to which I still owe a copy of Brenda Joyce’s Deadly Affair (sorry, BPL, but Sandy took that book from me, so you’ll never be getting that book back), and the CVS where I bought the cute Christmas balls that I put on my tree every year.  Boston was MY city–even if I had only lived there for slightly less than 2 years–and it was under attack.  Someone had taken what was normally such a fun event and turned it into a tragedy.  Over the past decade and a half, we have seen so much devastation.  First, there was Oklahoma City, which granted I barely remember since I was only 7 when it happened.  Then, there was Columbine.  This I remember much more clearly because I was a little older–just barely 12–and I was around the television much more.  There is that one image of a student dangling from a window, blood smearing the wall from where his hand touched it, which will always remain etched in my memory.  I remember thinking that these were people barely older than me and they were dead.  I just couldn’t understand it.  After that, of course, came 9/11.  I was just shy of 15 when the Towers fell, white smoke filling the city, visible even from my house in Queens. There is nothing about that day that I will ever forget–not even the clothes I wore or the game we played in gym class before the world came tumbling down around me.  Next, was Virginia Tech–6 years ago today.  That one hit close to home; I was in college at the time and the people that died were my age.  No one is supposed to die at 20.  Not in this country.  But they did.  And they do.  Not long after that–only a few months later–was the London Bombings on 7/7/07.  This wasn’t as close to home as the others, both literally and figuratively.  I didn’t know anyone in London, so it only affected me insomuch as extra security on the subway going into Manhattan.  Then, came Aurora and the Sikh Temple shootings.  Then came Sandy Hook.  No one was safe–not even 6 year old kids, sitting at their desks in school.  

Even after all of this, there was still something in me–in all of us, really–that can be shocked and appalled at what happened yesterday, which despite having only lived there for two years, hit much too close to home.  You see, I knew someone who was supposed to be running the marathon.  We weren’t particularly close, only knowing each other peripherally–she was a Ph. D student and I was an M.S. student. We saw each other at department get togethers and I even went to her Halloween Party in 2010, but we weren’t great friends.  That didn’t matter, though.  I knew she was going to be at the marathon and until I saw a status update on facebook I worried that she might have been one of the injured–at that point it wasn’t clear whether or not anyone had been killed in the blast.

Added to that was the fact that I have such fond memories of that part of Boston.  Those were streets that I knew well, and seeing them littered with bleeding bodies horrified me in a way that I did not know was possible.  Even now, over 24 hours later, I am still very much in shock.  I have been glued to my television and to facebook and twitter, hoping to learn something new from the various news outlets.  With each passing moment, however, I grow stronger in my belief that this monster will be caught and brought to justice.  And, I grow stronger in the belief that Boston will come back better than ever.  It will be changed, but it will not falter.  If there is one thing about Boston and about Bostonians it is that they don’t let anything keep them down.  Just ask Red Sox Fans.

Link

Countdown to Election Day 2013–AKA the Beginning of the End for Mayor Bloomberg

Just something to ponder–and give hope to those of us that are tired of Bloomberg’s despotism.

Rules to Live By (So You Don’t End Up Being Killed By Your Roommates/Family)

Most people are able to figure out how to live their lives without causing problems for other people, but some people don’t have the common sense of a turnip.  They’re just as likely to trample through your garden because it is the quickest route to the handicap parking as they are to walk around it–probably more so.  They’re just hardwired that way, possibly because no one has ever told them that the world does not revolve around them.  Well, it is time to put a stop to that.  Here are some helpful rules to deal with every day life.

1. Don’t assume that you know best.  There will always be someone that knows more than you do.  Often times, they have initials after their names (i.e. MD, DDS, Ph. D, JD, DVM, MS/MA) and have paid a shit ton of money to get them there, so if a professional tells you not to do something, DON’T DO IT.  They know what they’re talking about.

2. Don’t assume that everything in your home is yours.  If you didn’t buy it and it wasn’t given to you, it probably belongs to someone else.  Ask and the owner might just let you use it.  However, if you found whatever the item is on the bottom of someone’s closet, behind all of their other things, chances are they do not want you to have it because they have fucking hid it on you–they know you that well and they took precautions so you would not take that thing from them.

3. Don’t assume it is okay to change your clothes in the middle of the dining room.  It is NEVER okay to change your clothes in the dining room.

4. Don’t assume it is okay to pick at every piece of food on the table.  Other people would like to eat too and they don’t want your grubby paws all over their food.  Good rule of thumb: If you don’t want someone touching your food, don’t fucking touch theirs.  Corollary: Do not assume it is okay to eat off of someone else’s plate.  If it is not on your plate, HANDS OFF.

5. Don’t assume that you are more important than anyone else in the room.  YOU ARE NO MORE IMPORTANT THAT ANYONE ELSE.  If you are not willing to do something for someone else, do not think that everyone else is willing to do it for you because, sweetie, as Outkast said, “your roses really smell like poo-poo-poo.”

6. Don’t assume that it is okay for you to put my things away.  If I left something somewhere, there was probably a good reason for it.  If you don’t know why something is there, ask.

7. Don’t assume that it is okay for you to throw a cooking party in the middle of the night when everyone else is trying to sleep.  If you don’t want a parade going through your room, it is safe to assume that I don’t want that either.

8. “Do unto others as you would have done to you.”  I admit, this one is not mine, but it is good.  If you don’t want to be treated like the dirt under my shoe, don’t treat me that way.  Respect earns Respect.

So, there you have it.  Follow these rules and maybe you’ll live to see the end of your lease.

An Open Letter to Anne Sweeney Head of Programming at ABC

Dear Ms. Sweeney,

I am writing to you because I am concerned over the treatment of bullying on the Friday, January 4th episodes of Last Man Standing and Malibu Country.  I find it absolutely appalling that both of these so-called family shows felt that it was a good idea to make light of the issue of bullying.  Maybe people at your network are unaware of the bullying epidemic that is plaguing our society, but believe me your viewers are not.  Thousands of kids are bullied at school every day and the fact that both of these shows had story lines that defended bullying by calling the actions of the bullies “self defense” is not helpful and can have an adverse affect on the situation.

As someone who was bullied for most of her life, I cannot believe that anyone would willingly alienate their audience by making fun of the problem instead of seeking solutions to it.  The fact that Last Man Standing, which featured the middle child calling a classmate gay in a derogatory manner and had her giving the excuse that she did it in self defense, ended the half hour with a PSA on bullying was like throwing salt in the wound.  Even worse was following that with an episode of Malibu Country that went so far as to say that people are taking the anti-bullying stance too far.  When you have had to listen to a smart, 10 year old girl cry over the fact that classmates have beaten her up at school, there is no “going too far.”  When you see teenagers all over the country committing suicide because no one is standing up for them, there is no going too far.  However, ABC has gone too far in its nonchalance over the subject.

As I have written to you and this network before (over issues unrelated to this one), I am sure that this letter will fall on deaf ears as all of the others have.  I can, however, hope that someone at ABC will read this and do something about it.

Thank you for your time.

The Wrong Type of Girl

We grow up,

Being told to be nice.

Because being nice will help catch a man.

But catching a man isn’t all there is.

Being a good person is more important.

Being a REAL person is just as important.

Because being nice isn’t always real.

It isn’t who you are.

Underneath that smile is a sneer,

Because you think people should bow down to you.

As if you are the Queen.

But you’re no queen.

What you are is a bitch.

What you are is the wrong type of girl.

You go around,

Making people feel bad

About themselves,

To make you feel better about yourself.

You think if people don’t like themselves

That you’re the better person.

But what you are is a bitch.

What you are is the wrong type of girl.

You look at the world and ask,

“What can you do for me?”

You don’t want to help people

Unless they can help you.

Why should you pay

Like everyone else,

When you can get for free?

You wonder,

“How can I get some?”

When someone gets something,

Even if you don’t really want it.

You’re not very nice,

But you can fool people.

That smile of yours is rotten.

A trap.

You’re not fooling me.

I see who you are.

What you are is a bitch.

What you are is the wrong type of girl.

But you’re not alone.

There are many more just like you,

Who think that being real isn’t as important

As being nice.

I don’t worry about that too much.

Because one day, you’ll see.

You’ll see you for what you are.

And what you are is a bitch.

What you are is the wrong type of girl.

One day someone will show you.

Show you your place.

You’re not better than me.

You’re not better than anyone.

You’re just a bitch,

You’re just the wrong type of girl.

GOP = General Opression Party

The GOP, which officially stands for the Grand Old Party (how elitist is that?!), seems to think that women aren’t smart enough to make their own decisions about their bodies.  First, they tell us that we just don’t understand pregnancy and that we need to undergo painful trans-vaginal ultrasounds in order to legally have an abortion.  (Seriously?  They don’t think that we know that there is a life growing inside of us and that if we go through with an abortion that the life will be gone.  Believe me, we know, but there are a lot of reasons behind a woman’s decision to have an abortion.  We get it; our reasons do not matter to you because you think that you know better.)  Then, they tell us that our bodies can stop unwanted pregnancies when we are being raped.  Thank you, Todd Akin, for the biology lesson.  Unfortunately, you are wrong.  There is no such mechanism.  Honestly, I hope that whatever backwards schools you went to actually taught this ignorant mess, but I seriously doubt that you actually believe this.  I would be so happy if you were just that stupid, but I have come to the conclusion that you and your friends Rep. Steve King and Senator Paul Ryan believe that we are that stupid and that we’ll believe anything you say because you are men in power.  We don’t care how much power you have.  We have biology text books and google.  We have common sense.  It is obvious that you are willing to say anything to get us to let you criminalize abortions.

It isn’t just women that the GOP hates.  They hate anyone who isn’t a rich, straight, white, man.  They are constantly proposing legislation to limit the rights of anyone they consider different: women, gay people, blacks, and Hispanics.  Here in NY, our Republican in Independent Clothes (He knew he wouldn’t be elected in NYC as a Republican, so he changed his party affiliation to Independent to run on that ticket) approves of a policy that allows police to disregard the 4th and 14th Amendments and stop black people on the street and search them WITHOUT PROBABLE CAUSE.  Of course this law wasn’t specifically intended to be used against people of color, but that is how it has been carried out.  I am waiting for the day someone on the Supreme Court throws the book at Mr. Bloomberg and his dictatorial policies.

Then, of course, there are the Southern States that are blocking Gay Marriage simply because they find it uncomfortable to think about.  These are the same states that thought Anti-miscegenation laws were a good idea until the Supreme Court yelled at them in 1967.  All of these states have Republican governors, most of whom have signed that hateful NOM pledge against same sex marriage.

We CANNOT allow them to take away rights from people that don’t look and think like them.  We must VOTE in November.  Do whatever you have to do to stop them from gaining control once again.  If you live in one of the Republican lead states that have disenfranchised thousands of people in hopes of “stopping voter fraud” (i.e. stopping those elderly, minority, and poor scumbags—they’re thoughts, not mine—from having the right to vote) make sure you get a photo ID well before November 6th.  If you know of someone who doesn’t have ID, help them get it.  Take them to the DMV.  Loan them the money for the ID if you have to (it is only about $10 in NY for an ID and it was $20 in Boston—it won’t break the bank).

MAKE SURE YOUR VOICE IS HEARD.  HOLD THE GOP ACCOUNTABLE FOR ITS REPREHENSIBLE POLICIES.  VOTE OBAMA/BIDEN 2012.

A Change Must Come

Twelve people died yesterday morning.  Twelve families are missing loved ones.  Why?  That is a question that is most on everyone’s minds today.  Why did James Holmes walk into a theater in Aurora, Colorado and start shooting?  Why did he choose that theater and that day?  I don’t have any answers to those questions, and I’m not even sure that Holmes does–or at least if he does have the answers they may not satisfy our need to know.  More than likely, anything that he says (when he says something, since he has invoked his right to a lawyer) will make little sense to us.  These things rarely do.  However, there are other questions that need to be answered.  Questions like: Why was Holmes so easily able to get a gun–any gun, but especially why was he able to legally own assault rifles?  Why does anyone need an assault rifle?  Why is it that anyone can walk into a gun store and buy a gun and ammunition?  The answer of course is the Second Amendment, which states:

“A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.

In 1791, the Second Amendment, along with the other 9 amendments of the Bill of Rights, was ratified.  At that time, the newly formed United States did not have a standing army with which to defend itself and because of this individual state militias were created.  In order to arm these state militias the people living within the states needed to be able to own weapons, and Congress seeing the need gave people to right to bare arms.

Today, unlike 1791, we do have a standing army (not to mention a navy, air force, and marine corp) and there are no such things as state militias.  So why do we still feel the need to own guns?  I don’t know.  From where I am sitting, a gun is the furthest thing from my mind.  I don’t know how to use one and I don’t want to know how to use one.  However, I understand that there are some people, who do believe that a gun is essential to their survival.  A couple of months ago, I got into a facebook argument with one of my uncles because he believed that owning a gun was an important tool in the defense of one’s home and family.  Personally, I don’t understand that logic, but I know that there are people like my uncle, who do.

I do not want to take away the Second Amendment despite the fact that it is rather antiquated–would I be happy if I woke up tomorrow and learned that Congress got together overnight and decided to repeal the Second Amendment?  Sure, but because I don’t see it happening any time soon, I would be happy to settle for tougher gun control laws.  What we need, is a federal law limiting the sale of guns and ammunition, especially the types of guns that were used in the Aurora Theater Massacre the other night.  I can understand people wanting to own a gun to protect themselves, but no one needs an assault rifle to do that.  It is just as easy to shoot someone with a semi-automatic handgun as it is to shoot someone with military grade weaponry.  The only people that should have military grade weapons are people in the military.  I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t feel any safer knowing someone in my home owns a weapon like that than I do now, knowing that there aren’t any guns at my disposal.

There is no need for anyone to own an assault rifle and there is no reason for a person to have an arsenal at their disposal, and that is just what James Holmes had in his home.  Over the last six months, he had been building an arsenal of weapons that he purchased legally over the internet.  That is disturbing.  When buying something over the internet it is easy to claim you’re someone you aren’t.  I could go on Amazon right now, create an account in a name not my own, and purchase any number of items.  No one is to know that I am not the person I say I am.  There is no security over the internet.  Even if Holmes was ineligible to purchase a gun in the real world, on the internet he was.  He could purchase any number of weapons, legally over the internet.  Does no one else see a problem with that?  I can’t be the only person scratching my head over the fact that guns are available over the internet and NOBODY IS CHECKING ON WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE?  The fact that background checks, which are routinely required when buying guns in person, are not required when buying a gun over the internet is downright frightening.  Who is to say that the person buying these guns is not some nutjob planning to kill dozens of people?  NO ONE. That was the problem in Colorado.  James Holmes was a nutjob, who planned to kill dozens of people.  Obviously, our current system, or lack thereof, is not working.  If this was a one-off, the answer would be different.  However, that is not the case.  Time and time again, people who shouldn’t be able to own a gun use them to kill and wound masses of people.  It was just last year that Gabrielle Giffords was shot while on the CONGRESSIONAL FLOOR by a man, who by all rights was mentally unstable and should not have legally been allowed to own a handgun–but did.  Not long before that was the Fort Hood Massacre, and while perpetrated by a man in the military at the time, it is no less relevant and it forces the question of whether the way we care for our men and women in the military is up to par.  Before Fort Hood, there were shootings on the campuses of Northern Illinois State University, Virginia Tech, and an attempted shooting on the campus of Saint John’s University.  Of course before these shootings was the tragedy at Columbine High School, not 20 miles away from the Aurora shooting the other night.

Something needs to be done.  These types of things cannot continue.  I don’t pretend to have all the answers, but this one seems clear.  Tighten the gun control laws or there will be more senseless massacres like the one that occurred the other night in Colorado.